fuckingsnakes | and please, believe me when I say (closed)

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and please, believe me when I say (closed)

WHO: Yukimura, Saitou, Zhao Yun
WHAT: Conversations about the aftermath + Nagashino + feelings things
WHERE: Resistance Army Camp
WARNING(S): To be determined?

[So we have a Saitou/Yukimura conversation and a Zhao Yun/Yukimura conversation happening up in here. GOOD? GOOD.]

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About anything...?

[That gives him pause for thought. He almost wonders if perhaps he should talk to Zhao Yun about something that's been on his mind for quite some time concerning them-- that really, they've been dodging the discussion of for about as long as he can remember.

... somehow it doesn't seem right to.]

Is there anything in particular that you wish to bring up?

I cannot think of anything. [he is painfully oblivious to some things, and appears to only think of Saitou as a friend - everybody's friend, nothing more. He just wanted to know that his dear friend was all right, so unless he says anything to indicate that he isn't, Zhao Yun will remain painfully oblivious]

[That makes him smile a little.]

As long as everything is well with you, my friend, then I can hardly complain. There are other matters I wish to discuss with you, but they can wait until you're better.

I hardly think the state of my cuts and bruises will affect my ability to discuss matters. Unless it requires me to get up and rush out onto the battlefield already. If you have something on your mind, please.

[All of a sudden, he can't quite meet Zhao Yun's gaze.]

N-no, it is nothing like that. It... is something that I am admittedly not entirely sure how to bring up.

[he sits up and then forward, clasping his hands in his lap]

Speak your mind, Yukimura. We have more or less established that our friendship hasn't changed. You can trust me with anything. You will have my confidence, if that is what is needed.

... Do you truly believe that nothing has changed between us, since we first met?

[It's not an accusatory tone- he's more curious than anything.]

[he mulls it over, checking every facet of their friendship for a mistake]

...we have become closer, perhaps. But, while I remember the circumstances of our meeting, I find it hard to remember how it felt not to know you. We have been friends a long time.

[No, that's all that he really wanted to hear. Though there's a slight smile on his face when he says "perhaps".]

Only perhaps? I am closer to you than I am to most, Zilong. You have seen sides to me that others haven't. And I do not think that I would have it any other way. Even if this world can be difficult at times... I am glad that we were able to meet.

[oh, so fond of this man] And I will always do my best to live up to your trust in me. May I never give you cause to doubt.

I doubt that you could ever fail me, Zilong. And in turn I will do my best not to let you down either.

[well good, now that that's settled...]

...is that what you were worried about? How close we have become?

[Dammit, caught out. Yukimura flushes a little.]

Not exactly, no. Or rather- I find that I do not mind how close we are. Just that... I rather like it.

[well, that's a little weird at a time like this]

Are you sure everything is all right?

O-of course, I am simply overthinking things again. Perhaps I am still rather tired.

Oh. Then, I should not be taking up your time, if you need to rest.

[yep. that oblivious]

But Zilong, I wish to...

[Zhao Yun is oblivious and Yukimura fails to communicate what he wants every single time.

Now he's just getting frustrated with himself.]

Perhaps I should leave you be. I am hardly good company in such a state, anyway.

[well now you have him concerned, and pushing himself out of his chair]

Wish to what? Yukimura, I did say you could tell me anything. And I do not thing you to be poor company in any sense - I hope I haven't given you that impression. Please. Perhaps if you just let it out, you will feel better.

It is ... mostly about my behaviour when we returned to camp.

[In other words, the handholding.]

I apologise if I made you uncomfortable.

What? [thinking...what, falling asleep and being clingy?]

Oh, no. No, you didn't. I took no offense. You were tired, and I expect feeling out of sorts. I am glad I could be there for you.

Feeling out of sorts...

[Should he feel glad or guilty that it could be chalked up to that? Oops.]

I am glad that you were there with me.

...am I wrong?

[he really thought it was merely a friendly gesture, even if it made him feel all warm and happy inside]

It... felt right to do.

[Which could say a little, or it might say a lot.]

[that sounds like something completely different, although Zilong isn't quite sure what]

And if I said I did not mind, no matter what the reason?

No matter what the reason...? Are you certain of that?

[Though Yukimura's heart sure did skip a beat at the thought.]

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