fuckingsnakes | what happens when you put two honorsexuals on a mission together? (closed)

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what happens when you put two honorsexuals on a mission together? (closed)

WHO: Yukimura and Saitou
WHAT: Recon mission
WHERE: Hulao Gate
WARNING(S): Saitou and Yukimura in the same post equals high chances of blushing schoolgirl-type behaviour.

[A few months after saving everyone who had been stationed at Ueda Castle, everything seemed to have settled into something of a routine. There were still plenty of people that needed to be saved from various other points in the timeline, but there wasn’t the same sense of crushing hopelessness that there had been. It was almost… nice, in a way. Sure, they still had a lot of work to do, but they also had a purpose along with it.

Speaking of which, it was why Yukimura and Saitou had been sent to Hulao Gate to see what the situation was there. The cold weather wasn’t something that Yukimura was particularly used to, but he didn’t dare to complain. After all, he’d been fortunate enough to be sent on a mission with someone that he worked well together with – he couldn’t ask for anything more than that.

Still, it wasn’t a location that Yukimura recognised, so he couldn’t help but be curious about a few things. So while they were trying to find a place to set up camp, Yukimura decided to ask a few questions.]

Hajime-dono – have you been here before? I do not recognise the location, myself.

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H-Hajime-dono...?

[He's definitely rather close now. Yukimura has to remind himself not to do anything Saitou will punch him for later.]

[As if there's anything Saitou would punch him for.

But that question just makes Saitou feel a hundred times more self-conscious about what he's doing.]

If you insist on giving up so much of the blanket, I...wish to ensure that you are still warm enough, Yukimura-dono.

You do not mind this?

[Because there's something that compels him to want to take more. Even though he knows that he shouldn't. Yukimura swallows hard, trying to ignore his impulses.

... and yet he's leaning in even closer anyway. Now their faces are only inches apart.]

No, not at all.

[Although it feels like his heart is beating faster, when Yukimura leans in like that - but that's silly of him, isn't it? There's nothing to be nervous about when he trusts Yukimura implicitly, more than he'd trust almost anybody else.]

[Truth be told, Yukimura isn't entirely sure if what he's doing is the right thing anymore. It feels right, but Saitou could turn around and protest, and then--

It'd make for a very awkward night in a shared tent, that was for sure.

But that somehow doesn't stop him from cupping Saitou's cheek in his hand, the distance between them decreasing once again.]

And this?

[It...feels warm, again, in that way that has nothing to do with actual heat, and while this isn't the first time that thought has crossed his mind tonight, whatever he felt before was nothing compared to this.]

This is...also fine.

If you wish for me to stop...

[Then that's about the last warning that Yukimura is actually going to give, because unless Saitou tells him to back off, he's not sure that he can restrain himself.

The feelings have been there for months, he knew that, even if he'd been trying to avoid acknowledging them. But there's something about this situation that makes him want to push further than he's ever dared to go.]

[It's hard to admit it out loud - because expressing himself simply isn't how Saitou functions; he pushes his feelings to the side, he keeps them out of the way, he rarely lets anyone see the side of him that's anything but purely businesslike and professional.

But admitting to something here and now...surely that wouldn't get in the way of anything, would it?

And even as repressed as he tends to be, it's getting increasingly hard to deny to himself that -]

I don't.

[They're both the same, in that regard. It's always been duty before everything else - his own personal happiness has never played into it before. At least, not before now. Yukimura is terrible at figuring out how to get what he wants in his personal life. All he's ever tried to do is fight for his lord, or for the cause of the Resistance movement. His own desires had never played into it.

But everything had changed when he'd met Saitou, as cliché as that was. And for once, Yukimura wasn't sure that he minded it, even if he'd never felt so unsure about how to handle a situation before in his life. So far, though... so far, everything felt right.

... and so leaning forward to press his lips against Saitou's in a brief kiss doesn't feel wrong either. If this is wrong, he's not sure that he ever wants to be right again.]

[He'd always thought of this kind of thing as something that would only be in the way, a distraction from what he needed to focus on. He had his duty, he had his comrades, and anything more than that would get in the way.

And in a way, he's only realizing now how true that really is. If he had to lay down his life tomorrow, he doesn't want to think about what Yukimura would do when he found out. So even knowing that, and knowing what a conflict of interests he could be setting himself up for - he should be holding back, he should be telling Yukimura to stop there.

But he isn't.

He's just tilting his face up towards Yukimura's and wishing this could last longer.]

[There was no doubt that Yukimura wouldn't like it, but he would understand. They were similar in that regard - he too would put his life on the line without thinking too much about the consequences. If it was necessary, he'd go ahead and do it, even if the cost was high.

Knowing that they could lose one another at any moment, that they could be called upon to give such huge sacrifices, Yukimura shouldn't have been putting either of them in such a position at all. But really, what did they have to lose? They were from different time periods, they'd never get a chance to do this again. It wasn't as though they could wait for everything to be restored to normal to give this another try.

And that's why, when Saitou doesn't push him away, Yukimura dares to deepen the kiss, hoping that he wouldn't change his mind. He didn't want to have any regrets.]

[It's that understanding that makes this possible, as poorly timed and as ill-fated as it's likely to be. Saitou would lay down his life without blinking if Hijikata ordered it; there are precious few people who understand that the way Yukimura does, and he could never justify this to himself with any of them. Leaving behind someone who didn't get it would be too cruel; better never to let them grow that close to him in the first place.

But Yukimura understands, and that makes all the difference in the world.

They still have a lot to lose, but either of them would at least understand why they had to lose it.

He reaches up, his hand tentatively settling behind Yukimura's neck to pull him in closer.]

[With the ability to travel back in time, there's at least a chance that they can fix any errors they might make. Maybe their time will run out eventually without them being able to undo it; Yukimura is prepared for that. But he would rather have something and lose it than to never have taken the chance at all. It just makes it all the more important that they make the most of the time they do have together, even if it all ends tomorrow.

For now, Yukimura doesn't press for anything further than this - for the most part he keeps the kisses light, not wanting to overstep any boundaries (though he's fairly sure he's done more than enough of that already). He does, however, press as close as he is able to, enjoying the warmth and closeness that Saitou affords him.]

[They're already far beyond the boundaries Saitou usually sets for interaction with anyone - and yet he feels more comfortable with this than he ever would have thought possible. He slips his other hand behind Yukimura's shoulder, holding him as close as he can.

And yet it's still not close enough, somehow.]

[It's not quite enough, but Yukimura doesn't think to change that any time soon - he's still in disbelief at the fact that he hadn't been outright rejected.

Still, once he's found himself settling more into the kisses, he winds an arm around Saitou's waist, the other tugging at the tie holding his hair back. It's not that he's trying to push too far too quickly, but he can't... deny he's curious about some things. Maybe Saitou likes having his hair played with...]

[He's never given much thought to having his hair played with, one way or another. It's the kind of thing most people wouldn't dare to try, because it would more than likely earn them swift death by chopsticks -

- but if the last five minutes have made anything clear, it's that he doesn't mind Yukimura taking the kinds of liberties that nobody else would ever get away with, so he doesn't protest as Yukimura pulls out the tie and his ponytail comes undone.]

[Yukimura isn't most people, though it's rare that he chooses to be so bold when it comes to personal matters like this. This time, however, he finds that he can't really help himself at all. Once Saitou's ponytail has come undone, he wastes no time in running his fingers through his hair, tangling his fingers in the strands.

It... feels really good, actually. So much so that he already finds himself reluctant to stop.]

[It feels rather nice on Saitou's end, too, even though he wouldn't have expected to care much one way or another. Though maybe it's not so much the sensation itself as it's the simple fact that Yukimura is close and touching him and paying attention to him, and it almost doesn't matter what he's specifically doing as long as it's something like that.

He leans forward, breaking the kisses for a moment and resting his forehead on Yukimura's shoulder, his fingertips tracing lightly along the nape of Yukimura's neck.]

[There's nothing that he could possibly say that would do this moment justice. Or perhaps he simply doesn't want to risk ruining it with potential awkwardness on his part.

Once the kiss is broken he instead settles for holding Saitou close, one hand resting on the small of his back while the other continues to gently rub at his scalp. Maybe words aren't needed right at this very moment anyway. The closeness speaks for itself - and Yukimura has long since forgotten about the cold.]

[They certainly seem to have found their solution to the weather, that much is for sure.

And although somewhere at the back of his mind, he's dimly aware that night is falling and they should probably rest up for tomorrow anyway...well, staying like this a little bit longer couldn't hurt, could it?]

[No, it certainly couldn't hurt. And even though the kiss has been broken, that doesn't mean Yukimura wants to let go of Saitou. In fact, he seems to feel even more confident about keeping him close now, though he half expects Saitou to want to break away of his own accord.

... they can cross that bridge when they come to it.

After a while he winds both arms around Saitou and tugs him just a little closer, hoping that he's comfortable like this. Yukimura certainly is.]

[He's very comfortable, and if the way he relaxes and leans into Yukimura isn't a clear enough indication of that, the way he closes his eyes and rests his head on Yukimura's shoulder might still be.

He's not really used to this kind of physical contact. It's all backslapping bro-touching amongst the Shinsengumi captains, and while even he can't always escape all of that, he's probably on the receiving end of it less than the rest of them - and the giving end not at all. This is completely different, and...much more comfortable.

He doesn't want to move, even if they really ought to think about sleeping sometime.]

[Well, in order to sleep it's not as though they have to move far, right? Maybe if they just lie down together...

Wait, that doesn't sound like a bad idea. But Yukimura's a little too comfortable like this, and he doesn't want to disrupt Saitou when he looks so content. Has he ever seen him look that way? He doesn't think that he has.

How much time passes before he starts to tug Saitou with him so that they can lie down together, even he's not sure. At least he's making a start.]

[It catches him off-guard for just a moment - but Saitou is quick enough to realize what Yukimura is doing, so he goes with the flow easily, pulling on the blanket to be sure they don't lose it on the way down.]

[Good boy, Saitou. But he doesn't get a biscuit as a reward- instead once they're comfortable enough, Yukimura draws him in close again, draping an arm over his waist. Who said he could get away?]

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