and please, believe me when I say (closed)

[ex_onslaught851]

WHO: Yukimura, Saitou, Zhao Yun
WHAT: Conversations about the aftermath + Nagashino + feelings things
WHERE: Resistance Army Camp
WARNING(S): To be determined?

[So we have a Saitou/Yukimura conversation and a Zhao Yun/Yukimura conversation happening up in here. GOOD? GOOD.]

Comments

[iaijutsu]

[There isn't anything Yukimura can do, but Saitou is grateful for the support, regardless.

...there is one thing Yukimura can do, but it's something Saitou refuses to ask of anyone.]

Thank you.

[And he pauses, trying to decide where to begin. Not with the story as it happened to him; he won't divulge the shogunate's part in the ochimizu experiments, even if asked. So perhaps the best place is simply to start with the definitions and take it from there.]

I doubt I need to explain to you why some humans would desire the kind of power innate to the oni. I do not know the details of the research that was done into the matter, but the end result was a drug. We call it ochimizu. It grants those abilities to humans...but at a steep cost.

[ex_onslaught851]

[No, Saitou didn't need to tell him that much. He knew what the hearts of men were like- though he did wonder why Saitou would wish to take such a thing. However, he wasn't going to ask. All he knew, somehow, was that he wouldn't take it for the wrong reasons.

... but what would the right reasons be?]

And what is this cost?

[iaijutsu]

...the cost is one's sanity.

[It's the most important part, but it's the part he doesn't want to divulge. Yukimura knowing he isn't human is one thing. Yukimura knowing what's really going on in his mind when his eyes turn red in the heat of battle...

...it's not a side of himself he ever wanted the other man to see.]

Those who drink the ochimizu are affected by bloodlust. It isn't simply a desire, it... [Trying to describe this is harder than it should be - though whether the harder part is finding the words or getting them out, he's not sure.] It's a need. Denying oneself is frustrating at the best of times and agonizingly painful at the worst.

Some go mad on the spot. Some...manage to hold themselves in check, for a time.

[ex_onslaught851]

... but Hajime-dono-- that means...!

[For a moment, Yukimura has to fight to hold back the horror that rises up within him at that revelation. It's not that he's judging Saitou for making that choice, for whatever reason he'd made it. It's just that--

The thought that he could lose Saitou to something like that. It didn't sit well with him in the slightest, and yet Yukimura could do absolutely nothing about it. Admitting it wouldn't help either - it likely would only make Saitou feel worse about the situation, and he didn't deserve that.]

Have you been denying yourself? Is... You already said that there is nothing that I can do, but are you certain of that?

[The desperation in his tone might give him away a little, however.]

[iaijutsu]

I have been able to manage thus far, Yukimura-dono.

[What a delightfully vague answer.

But what else is he supposed to say? "I haven't been drinking anyone's blood and it hurt so much I tried to claw my own heart out of my chest" doesn't exactly seem like the way to calm Yukimura down.]

[ex_onslaught851]

Hajime-dono...

[That only serves to make Yukimura worry further.]

Are you sure that there is nothing I can do?

[And yes, he's going to keep asking.]

[iaijutsu]

Yes.

[It's a half-truth. Yukimura could do one thing. Saitou would refuse to accept it even if he did.

There's little point in treading that ground.]

[ex_onslaught851]

... Very well. If that changes, please let me know.

[Though he knows better than that. Saitou will never ask him.]

[iaijutsu]

I will.

[He won't.]

[ex_onslaught851]

[You are a bad liar, Saitou Hajime. Or maybe you and Yukimura are far too similar in some ways.]

Is there anything else I need to know about this?

[iaijutsu]

If others from my time are here, it is possible that the one who created the ochimizu is here as well. We may encounter other rasetsu sooner or later.

[The possibility that Kodo is around and up to some nasty shit is totally more important than "also sunlight makes me tired as shit," right? Right.]

[ex_onslaught851]

Other rasetsu... Very well. Is there anything that we should tell the other men about them, so they are prepared? We do not need to tell them more than is necessary.

[That is to say, that Saitou is also one.]

[iaijutsu]

Obviously, they will need to be killed in one hit. The only surefire ways to do so are by taking off the head, or piercing the heart.

[...piercing the heart.

Ahaha.

Still probably a little awkward to mention.

...and there's more, right. Warning the troops is important enough that he probably should get this out, even if he'd hoped not to bring it up because Yukimura will probably take it as one more thing to worry about -]

They are weaker by daylight.

[ex_onslaught851]

[It takes him a moment to remind himself that he needs to stay professional about all of this. There's no need to freak out about it-- yet. Though of course, once he mentions piercing the heart, Yukimura starts having Ueda flashbacks.

And yes, he's going to worry. But right now he knows that he needs to listen. He can't afford to start freaking out after every bit of information.]

Very well. Are there any warning signs that the men can look out for, so they know that they're dealing with rasetsu?

[iaijutsu]

There is no obvious way to tell until their hair and eyes change, I am afraid.

[By which point they're probably halfway on top of you and regrowing an arm.

Bad for most of the army. Good for Saitou, though, probably.]

[ex_onslaught851]

As long as there is something to look out for, then that is a good enough start. I will let the other officers know. At the very least, we can adapt our training.

[And yet the thought of it just makes him feel more tired.]

[iaijutsu]

We may be able to learn more, if we can find others from my time. I admit that I know far less about the ochimizu than I would like.

[They might also know as little as him, but it's long been clear to the Shinsengumi that someone out there on the other side knows more than they should. It could work in their favor, here...or explode in their faces.]

[ex_onslaught851]

Others from your time... We could ask around camp, and send messengers to those of our contacts who have not joined up with the Resistance army directly. Perhaps there is something to be found there.

[He hopes, at least. Right now they need all of the help that they can get.]

[iaijutsu]

...I would like to do so even if there is nothing to be gained by it, if I may be blunt for a moment.

[Not that Yukimura isn't an awesome comrade, but a guy starts to miss his bros after so long.]

[ex_onslaught851]

[That makes Yukimura smile.]

Of course. It's no trouble to send some messengers their way; I will ask for you. I simply need some names and descriptions to go off.

[iaijutsu]

I will make you a list. Thank you, Yukimura-dono.

[ex_onslaught851]

You needn't thank me for that. I am more than happy to help.

[iaijutsu]

Perhaps I do not need to. But I wish to, regardless.

[ex_onslaught851]

[That makes him flush slightly.]

If you insist, Hajime-dono, then I will not protest. At least, not too much.

[iaijutsu]

I believe you would get along well with the rest of my comrades, as well.

[Is it too early in this relationship to bring the boyfriend home to meet Daddykata? Oh well.]